Meddlesome muddle

An uncredited Ian McShane narrates the introduction to Nicholas Cage's reputed brainchild: a riff on the classic Disney cartoon version of Paul Dukas' musical interpretation of Goethe's famous poem, The Sorcerer's Apprentice. That McShane lends his dulcet tones to the venture does not redeem it from inanity, however. The trifecta of Cage, director John Turteltaub and producer Jerry Bruckheimer are not at their nadir (oh no, the National Treasure franchise holds that honor), but the plodding coming-of-age tale they've produced isn't likely to amuse anyone with the wit, say, of an animated rodent.

The arc of the tale takes us from the mythical days of Merlin to modern times, where young Dave Stutler (Jay Baruchel) comes under the tutelage of Balthazar Blake (Cage), an ageless wizard tasked with preventing Maxim Horvath (Alfred Molina) and his fellow evil wizards from destroying the world.

Rather than duty or honor, Balthazar's motivating force owes its anima to long-lost love. He carries with him a special doll that contains his one true love (Monica Bellucci as Veronica Gorloisen), and his pupil is supposed to be the key to, among other things, releasing her from captivity. While instructing Dave in all things fantastical, Balthazar slowly develops a relationship with the young man, ushering him into manhood as well as magicianship, and by the film's finale, the duo's bond proves a crucial element in the general victory of good over evil.

Dave is soon treated to the romantic attentions of Becky (Teresa Palmer), the improbably pretty love interest. Despite being categorized as a "dangerous distraction" by Balthazar, the allure of the feminine proves too great a temptation for Dave to resist, not that he tries terribly hard to do so. Palmer's halting and doe-eyed turn is counterposed by Baruchel's likable if limited performance as the awkward, insecure geek who has been chosen by fate to fill the prophesied role of spell-casting messiah.

Cage is his usual flat, mirthless, soporific self, plowing through lines at a glacial pace, often visibly wincing when forced to muster the energy to muddle through the ample amount of empty, forced exposition in the film.

Whatever action the film contains is marred by jump cuts and flashy editing. It is understandably difficult to render supernatural phenomena in a plausible manner, but Turteltaub's cinematographic choices make the magical mundane rather than thrilling.

As with any Bruckheimer production, no expense was spared where effects, stunts and setting are concerned. And as with most of the producer's films, all the excess is mildly boring. When Dave attempts to clean his digs with magic in a nod to the iconic sequence featuring Mickey Mouse from 1940's Fantasia, the inevitable charmed accidents are uninspired and tedious. It's peculiar that Disney consented to such a half-hearted handling of one of its earliest and most beloved properties.

In any case, this latest incarnation of the errant aspiring wizard is anything but magical. Cage has reportedly claimed credit for the inspiration to take a whack at the tale - no fewer than six writers are credited as contributing - and if this is indeed the case, one wonders just what it would take to tease a little enthusiasm from the languid actor. I suppose it's easy poise he's aiming for, but I can't be alone in feeling his approach seems marginally lazy. His calm rarely seems to mask anything more than apathy. His drowsy, almost slurred delivery also seems to have the effect of lulling his fellow performers into mediocre performances (the typically effective Molina makes an underwhelming villain, for instance).

It's rumored Walt Disney's scowling visage served as the model for some of the wizard's disapproving looks in the animated classic. One can only assume he'd look on this latest production with considerable disapproval indeed.

James Walling can be reached at
jwalling@praguepost.com